EPIPHANY SALE • by KJ Kabza

The sign taped to the edge of the table read, ‘Epiphany Sale: 50% Off!’

I looked up. Under the hot August sun, a freckled kid sat patiently at his card table (Epiphany stand?) at the edge of his lawn. In the side yard, someone, presumably his mother, was watering petunias. “What is this?” I asked. “Why aren’t you selling lemonade, like most kids?”

He smiled, revealing a gap in his front teeth, and wordlessly tapped a little finger atop the table, above the sign. In smaller print beneath, it read, ‘Only one dollar.’

“Oh, what the hell.” I fished out my wallet and gave him a buck. “Okay. What’s my epiphany?”

He folded his hands. “It’s coming.”

I shuffled my feet and looked up and down the sidewalk. Some lady walked her Labrador; a few older boys banged the decks of their skateboards against a curb as they tried to impress each other. I exhaled through my teeth and stuck my thumbs in my pockets.

“You’re not actually selling anything, are you?” I asked.

He grinned. “Would you like another?”


KJ Kabza, a former finalist of the L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Contest (third quarter, 2007), has published science fiction, fantasy, horror, and literary works in a variety of smaller venues, both print and online. Most recently, his work has appeared online in Every Day Fiction, KidVisions, The Ranfurly Review, and Quantum Kiss, and in print in the anthology Fried! Fast Food, Slow Deaths from Graveside Tales.


Posted on February 4, 2008 in Humour/Satire, Stories
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13 Comments »

Comment by João Ventura
2008-02-04 02:32:23

Great!


 
Comment by Gerard Demayne
2008-02-04 04:29:33

Very clever.


 
Comment by Bonnie
2008-02-04 04:31:16

I should have seen it coming, but I didn’t. I’m running late for work but I had to tell you your story made me laugh.

Bonnie!


 
Comment by --
2008-02-04 04:39:21

Hahaha!
Smart, smart.


 
Comment by GMoney
2008-02-04 04:45:57

Nice to see clever, original short ones like these on here!


 
Comment by Alexander Burns
2008-02-04 06:01:43

Hah! Nicely done!


 
Comment by James Enge Subscribed to comments via email
2008-02-04 06:41:11

This slew me. What a great story!


 
Comment by mike whitney Subscribed to comments via email
2008-02-04 07:12:05

A good joke, well told.


 
Comment by Avis Hickman-Gibb
2008-02-04 07:34:49

Yep - I didn’t see it coming and I chortled! VERY funny - both the joke and the delivery.


 
Comment by Kevin Shamel
2008-02-04 08:31:40

Brilliant! Beware of freckled kids…


 
Comment by DJ Barber
2008-02-05 09:28:13

Nice!! I especially liked him asking if she’d like another–LOL!


 
Comment by sylvia
2008-02-15 16:28:21

I have to admit I laughed.


 
2008-03-04 20:01:09

[...] Epiphany Sale [...]


 
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