Mon 18 Jan 2010
Is Your ‘BUT’ Too Big?
Posted by Jon Gibbs under fiction, life experience, motivation
[13] Comments
Never shy about giving people the benefit of her opinion (whether it was asked for or not) my old gran was always telling someone their ‘but’ was too big.
On the face of it, that seems a little rude, even for my old gran, but she wasn’t talking about pants’ sizes. She was referring to those built-in excuses we like to keep handy, in case our sub-conscious starts prompting us to chase our dreams.
“But I’m too young/too old.”
“But he/she’s out of my league.”
“But people might laugh at me.” [Not a problem if your dream is to do standup comedy]
Writers’ buts.
Writers too, have built-in ‘buts’ as it were:
“I’d love to write, but I just don’t have the time.”
“I’d love to write, but I don’t know anything about grammar.”
“I’d love to write, but there’s no writing group where I live.”
If you ask me, none of those ‘buts’ matter. They’re all just a way of avoiding the real problem, the biggest ‘but’ of them all:
“But I might fail.”
The fear of failure can stop a person from even trying. Have you ever almost pitched a story to a high-paying magazine, almost sat down to write a novel, or almost entered a writing contest? If so, then join the club. I imagine just about every writer has had that experience at some point or other.
I’ll bet there are thousands of great (or potentially great) storytellers out there who’ll never get published. I suspect for most, it’s because they let their ‘but’ get between themselves and the chance of success. You’ve probably met some of them.
Be wary of such people. Many of them carry a virus, Excusitis, a mental affliction which can kill writing dreams by causing the person suffering from it to doubt themselves and their ability. Symptoms include excessive use of the phrases like ‘I wanted to be a writer, but…’, ‘I’ve always thought I had a book in me, but…’, ‘I love writing, but…’
While not always contagious, many sufferers become bitter, unable to wish other folks success in endeavors which they themselves once dreamed of pursuing. Instead of support they offer mockery, instead of encouragement they try to plant seeds of doubt in your head.
Avoid these people at all costs or risk becoming infected yourself.
So what’s the difference between writers who go on to achieve their writing dream and those who don’t?
I don’t believe it’s talent – though it would be naïve to think that talent isn’t a vital part of the equation.
It certainly isn’t luck – that’s just a silly excuse used by folks who think there’s an easy path to success.
I believe the difference is simple.
Successful writers refuse to allow their ‘buts’ to get in the way. They see a ‘but’ as an obstacle which must be overcome rather than an excuse to quit… at least that’s what I’m hoping.
Me, I’m nearer fifty than forty; between leaving school at sixteen (with a poor academic record) and my 42nd birthday, I’d never written a word of fiction. Believe me, I could come up with a dozen more great excuses. The point is who cares? I figure all those things will just make my ‘How I done it’ story a little more interesting if and when I become successful as a writer.
How about you?
What ‘buts’ have you put behind you as you chase your writing dream?
This post was originally published at http://jongibbs.livejournal.com/68015.html.
Jon Gibbs is an active member of both The Garden State Horror Writers and The Monmouth Creative Writing Group . His story “Wild West Justice” will appear in The Best of Every Day Fiction Two coming out this month. He can usually be found hunched over the laptop in his kitchen. One day he hopes to figure out how to switch it on.
13 Responses to “ Is Your ‘BUT’ Too Big? ”
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Jon! Welcome to FFC. So glad you’re here. Be sure and let your readers know you have a post up.
Thanks, Gay
A great deal of truth here, Jon. I’ve always been saddened that my mother spent 30 years on research, but was afraid to submit her work. I inherited her MS and guilt made me try to publish it.
Sorry to hear about your mum, Walt.
Did you have any luck with her MS?
Insightful. Truthful. Hit the mark. Which means time to sign off of here and facebook and get back to writing my novel. Congratulations on ignoring the “but” and submitting to FFC.
Thanks, Ann. God luck with that novel
Very nice post. A few ‘buts’ I am constantly trying to overcome:
– But I’m too busy with real life.
– But I’ll never be as good as (insert name of professional writer here).
– But (insert magazine here) rejected that story, so why should I submit it somewhere else?
Hi Jennifer,
I’m in a constant battle with my buts. As soon as I get one sorted, another appears, but I find them much easier to deal with now I recognize that, if I want to have some success at writing, I can’t let my ‘but’ get in the way.
Thanks for sharing
I’ve taught a few adult-school classes to people who felt they “had a book in them,” and tried to be encouraging. But (there’s that word again) the cruel truth is that with the competition today, unless you absolutely can’t stand NOT to write, you probably won’t make it. People who are on the fence and letting the “buts” stop them need may need to accept the idea that maybe it’s just not that important to them. Those who feel compelled to write also have their fears of failure, but they do it anyway. That’s not to discourage the person who wants to write as a nice hobby — or for himself and his friends and family — but there’s a big difference in commitment.
Hi,
Good points all.
Thanks for sharing
I used to be a but-er…
Now I just write and submit–three dozen successes in ’09.
A but will always stop you dead in your tracks so I write–then submit.
The worst that ever happens is-”No”–and even then I sometimes get somethinfg like–”this was pretty good, not just what we want right now. Submit something else though, this was very close….
–dj
“Three dozen successes in ’09.”
Congratulations dj, and thanks for stopping by